because my pretty pretty paperwhites are blooming!


for years i have wanted to force paperwhite narcissus bulbs in a “forcing jar” around christmas time.  this year my mom got me a jar and a bulb for christmas.  it is  almost ready to pop!  the stems are the most lush color of green, and the life that even those stalks bring to the grey winter days is amazing. 

we made it through school in about an hour today.  sweet bella had a tummy ache yesterday so we took it easy the last few days.  somehow she has managed to get a day ahead in her computer work, so we took a day off from that.  she is really flying in her math studies~so much so, that i am already ordering 4th grade math for her. 

also, i’ve been giving the sermon from sunday some more thought.  pastor spoke about being a “crystal spring” to those around us… jumping off from the fact that the first two words in our church name are those two.  he said that we were either water or desert to those that we meet and that we weren’t doing very well as a congregation at being a “spring that is overflowing” to our community right now.  he chided us to “live up to our name”.  it is a sermon that he has preached before to deaf ears, and i am not sure he did much better this time around. 

i hate coming home from church and feeling like i have been given a lecture instead of reminded of God’s faithfulness.  our pastor, who just happens to also be my father in law, has a tough job right now, and i am grateful to him that he is willing to do it, but i am not one of the “apathetic souls” that he keeps addressing, and after approximately two years, i miss hearty teaching!  there are many in our church who think that going to church is nothing more than the “right thing to do” if you are a christian, and i disagree with those people.  if you are not at church to further the growth of “the mind of Christ” in your life, then don’t go.  the problem is, most of the members at our church are old school dutch crc (it’s mostly a michigan thing… look it up) or baptist, and they don’t know what it is to have a life changing, daily walk, everything i do relationship with Christ.most don’t understand what it is to have  a relationship like i have talked about before that is not dictated by rules and “shoulds and shouldn’ts” but the redeeming power of His love.  most of them give no thought to sunday morning in any way other than showing up, and those who serve do so out of a sense of duty, not a sense of God’s calling.  so that leaves us empty and void when it comes to sermons and teaching because pastor feels there is something vitally wrong with the core beliefs of the church at large(and in many ways he is right) so he preaches to that demographic every week.

we are not a large church.  and amante and i left for a while to try worship with another congregation because of just this sort of thing.  we were called back to this congregation, and have obeyed.  still, i am not growing within it and i am wondering what role we play in the future of this church.  i think it all plays into the search i am on right now, i just don’t know how yet. 

i realize that there are a lot of people in the world with a lot of wrong ideas about what it means to be a christian. 

i just wish i could help my father in law reach some of those hearts in my own church so that he could get back to really preaching.


~ by Erin on 16 January, 2007.

5 Responses to “it’”

  1. If you wish to help, perhaps you need to be praying for God to show you a way to become more involved…or at least that your life will become that spring your pastor was talking about. Is there any needs at your church that you can fill? Any women’s studies that you can join?

    If it is, it’ll make so much noise and be so attractive to the rest of your congregation that they won’t be able to help but look and immitate!

    I’ll be praying for you both as you search together for His will and how He will use you.

  2. i talked to my mom about that yesterday. however there is an issue with people taking things on, and then no one being willing to come along side them in support and help. i quit the women’s bible study because they needed a babysitter one day in a pinch, and the next thing i knew it, i was doing it full time. i stopped being on the women’s committee because others were shutting down my ideas then coming up with essentially the same thing down the road and claiming the credit for it. amante stopped doing sound and playing on the music team because he was the only one doing it every single week. when we speak out, people think us too progressive… too left wing… patience… that is the key right now… and lots of nights out at louies… yeah.

  3. I knew it was you. Don’t worry–I won’t tell your mom.

  4. I understand what you mean about getting “stuck” with something. For whatever reason that seems to be a common symptom of deeper problems within churches.

    However, as a word of encouragement to not give up: 1 Tim. 4:12 It’s starting to become my theme…proabably for the next several months as I and my group/adults go through growing pains. Fun, eh?

  5. thanks debbielynn. yay! debbielynn is reading sparrow song!

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